such as Mary Oliver (
The Journey
,
Wild Geese
)
Naomi Shihab Nye (
Kindness
)
Billy Collins
(
Aimless Love
)
Derek Walcott (
Love after Love
)
and David Whyte (
All the True Vows
)
Sessions close with another question and answer period, a home practice assignment to carry the
topic into daily life, and a brief meditation. Course members are given home practice monitoring
sheets to record how much they meditate each day, what meditation or combination of meditations
they’re doing, and how often each day they remember to use informal practices. The self-
monitoring sheets are primarily a reminder to practice self-compassion every day.
A complete training manual with protocols for each session will be published in 2014 by the
authors. Additional resources are books by Kristin Neff (
Self-Compassion: Stop Beating Yourself
Up and Leave Insecurity Behind
)
and Christopher Germer (
The Mindful Path to Self-
Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions
)
and the following
websites:
and
) where students can
download guided meditations. The following synopsis of the MSC program focuses on the key
ideas and practices introduced in each session. The reader is also advised that changes will be
made over the coming years as the program continues to develop.
Session 1: Discovering Self-Compassion
The main question of self-compassion training is “What do I need?” The goal for our patients is to
become mindfully aware when they’re suffering (“Ouch!” “This is a moment of suffering”, “This
hurts!”) and to respond in a comforting, affectionate manner. That response can come in an infinite
number of ways, such as drinking a cup of tea, taking a hot bath, talking with friends, exercising or
listening to music. For some people, meditation is especially helpful. For others, perhaps anti-
anxiety or anti-depressant medication may be the best way to take care of oneself. Participants
are encouraged to explore how they care for themselves
already
, and to begin to explore how they
can bring kindness to themselves particularly when they suffer, fail or feel inadequate.
When things go wrong in our lives, we’re usually more comforting and soothing towards others
than towards ourselves. What does it actually mean to comfort ourselves? Three subsystems of
the nervous system are introduced in session 1 –
threat, reward
and
soothing
. Self-
compassion means activating the soothing system through various means, such as the power of
touch. An exercise of placing one’s hand over the heart – sensing the warmth of the hands, the
gentle pressure of the hand on the chest, and feeling the rhythmic movement of the breath
underneath the hand – is taught in session 1 as a way of activating the soothing system.
Participants of the MSC program learn the meaning of self-compassion in the first session. This
can take place through a PowerPoint presentation and/or lecture, class exercises and poetry.
Course members also learn what self-compassion is
not
. It’s not:
• Sugarcoating
– We’re opening to pain more fully, not bypassing it.
• Egoistic self-esteem
– It’s a way of relating to ourselves kindly, not evaluating ourselves as
better than others.
• Complacent
– It’s a force of will – good will. Self-compassion takes courage, and motivates
change by providing the emotional resources needed to learn and grow.
• Self-indulgent
– It’s concerned with the alleviation of suffering, and therefore chooses long-
term health and well-being over short-term pleasure.
• Self-pity
– We’re disentangling from pain by entering into it, but we’re not wallowing in it.
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