Cultivating Alternative Paths to Compassion
Introduction
Approaching the cultivation of compassion from many paths ensures a better result. Not only can
we directly practice compassion, we can also indirectly practice compassion. This dual approach
maximizes the cultivation of compassion. By reducing and eliminating hindrances to compassion,
we expand our compassion and purify it with fewer strings and expectations attached. These
hindrances are rooted in our selfishness. In this chapter I will review alternative pathways to
compassion through generosity, forgiveness and patience and focus on the experience of
cultivating these positive emotions. These indirectly enhance our compassion.
Generosity
Generosity is a natural outward expression of an inner attitude of compassion and loving-kindness.
Generosity refers not to just giving materially, but to generosity of the heart. Generosity breaks our
tight grip on miserliness, which wants to hoard and keep everything for our self. Miserliness feels
very selfish. It blocks us from sharing with others. This is true not only for material giving, but also
for emotional support, protection and love. So generosity takes several forms. First, there is giving
material things. Second, there is offering freedom from fear. This means providing safety and a
sense of protection. It means providing security, often on an emotional level through non-
judgmental listening and genuine sincere concern. Third, there is offering of spiritual counsel. This
is offering advice and guidance to see the bigger picture in the context of interdependence. This
means guidance to view the situation from wider perspectives. It also offers advice to counter the
destructive emotions. Fourth, there is giving love. By gradually expanding our generosity we reduce
our self-centered attitude. The more our generosity expands, the more our heart opens, fueling the
fire of genuine concern for others. Let me share an experience of giving when I gave a significant
portion of my savings to my teacher. At first it was quite scary. “What will I do without that money?”
I thought. Then I decided to give it anyway. Afterward I felt so good and happy. Later I gave more.
It felt like a weight was lifted from my shoulders. My chest seemed to open up, allowing deeper
natural breathing. I haven’t shared this story until now, so it has remained like a gem in my heart.
For the rich, wealth beyond a certain level does not bring any real value unless this wealth is put to
good use. After a certain point, greater luxury and extravagance have no real effect on one’s
comfort. Eventually wealth becomes merely a series of figures on paper or a computer screen.
Even for those with limited means, an attitude of generosity has huge benefits in opening the heart
and bringing a sense of sympathetic joy and connection with others as I related in my story above.
Generosity can be included in whatever activity we do. It becomes a way of life. When I am open,
there is a feeling that I would like to give joy to anyone I meet. Of course my heart is not always
open like this, but sometimes it is. We can be kind, attentive and honest in our dealings with others.
We can offer praise when appropriate. We can offer comfort and advice when needed. Simply
sharing our time sincerely with someone else opens our heart. These are all forms of generosity
that do not require wealth.
When practicing generosity, as with all the other complementary practices for enhancing
compassion, we can deepen the practice by grounding it in wisdom. Wisdom does not take giving
for granted. Instead it examines more deeply the nature of the giver, the gift and the act of giving.
By recognizing these three to be merely names and concepts, we feel in harmony with reality.
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